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We are excited to have a guest post from Dawn, the third original writer for merelymothers.
Now that the cooler weather has finally arrived in the VA area, I’ve been taking my daughter to the park much more often. I’ll run into another SAHM every once in a while but, for the most part, it’s me and a few of the local nannies and our kid(s) frequenting the parks in my area during the week. On two separate occasions just this past week, when I did run into SAHMs, I wasn’t surprised when our conversation turned to the “bad nanny behavior” that was happening around us – nannies yelling at very young children; nannies letting very young children run/play far out of their reach; nannies not watching children closely on playground equipment; a nanny who had her charge sit in a stroller during the entire park visit rather than engaging him; and nannies socializing with each other rather than keeping an eye on their charges.
It made me curious to know how the hard working parents of these children would feel if they saw this behavior. And how do working parents monitor how a nanny takes care of their children? (I for one would not want a nanny yelling at my daughter. I would want the nanny to use the same scolding/disciplining techniques that my husband and I use with her – calm and assertive ones.)
I’d love to hear from your readers who are working parents. How do you monitor your nanny’s behavior? How do you make sure the nanny is treating your children as you would want them to be treated? And how do you make sure that your nanny is watching your child/ren as closely as you would?
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
It’s funny that you say this, because it was my time as a SAHM that I got to witness some really wonderful nannies. The nannies were attentive, loving and the kids clearly loved them too. I don’t think I could’ve gone back to work if I didn’t have the opportunity to see firsthand that most nannies truly care about their charges and take the job seriously. In fact, I have never seen a single nanny do any of the things I am embarrassed to say I have done (rarely, but still) in frustration, like grab their upper arm to lead/drag them as they dawdle across a busy street when my arms are full of bags, talk sarcastically about them in their presence, or other things like that. My nanny is part of a community of caregivers that meets at the same playground every day. They watch over all the kids, talk, and host playdates. She also goes to story time at the library, where there are lots of nannies with their kids. Our nanny sends me a picture almost every day showing all the fun stuff they are doing. I never asked her to do this, but I think it’s great. She is truly wonderful. So I have no doubt in my mind S is taken care of well. I think if you were nervous about how your nanny is treating your kid, you could sign them up for a class, and talk to the instructor about what they are observing when the nanny and your child go to the class? Or ask the other families that play in the playground at the same time the nanny goes.
Hadyn recently posted..Banana Bread with Fresh Cherries
Thanks for your comment, Hadyn. I should have mentioned that I have seen and met many wonderful nannies while on excursions with my daughter. And when I have had the opportunity to meet the exceptional ones, I make a point of telling them how wonderful they are with their charge(s). Because everyone deserves praise on the job! BTW – You’re nanny sounds amazing!
Dawn recently posted..How Do You Monitor Your Child’s Caregiver?
I work outside the home four days a week and we take my daughter (age 2) to the babysitter’s house on three of the four days. When we were looking for childcare, I felt we did a very thorough interview process with all of our candidates and asked about things that were important to us. It is my belief that you are not going to be able to control every.single.thing (which is/was hard for me to acknowledge, being a control freak!) but you can somewhat control the things that are important to you. Our caregiver is wonderful and is on the same page re: parenting style and our important things. Something that our caregiver does that I really like is she writes down what food my daughter ate, her nap schedule and what they did all day in terms of activities. This is helpful for both my husband and I to initiate conversation with my daughter at dinner-time re: what she did all day. I think if you have the opportunity to do a good interview, this is a good foundation on which to build. I would also say though that we try to be very proactive and communicative about everything. If someone did have concerns about their childcare provider, my advice would be to trust your instincts.
Amy S recently posted..Wanted: A Running Buddy
Your childcare provider sounds wonderful, Amy! And you offer some really great advice here – be honest and open from the start about what kind of childcare you’re looking for when interviewing a babysitter or nanny.
Dawn recently posted..How Do You Monitor Your Child’s Caregiver?