My son is two years and four months. It seems, in my mind (based on nothing but my own opinion) that we should be able to start the toilet-training process at this point. Compounding this are the facts that most of my son’s friends are girls, and they are all showing interest in the toilet. They all seem to know what to do on it, and they all are progressing in their training.
I bought my son one of those plastic toilet seats that goes on the big-person toilet, hoping it would spark interest.
He put it on his head.
Although he knows what it feels like to be wet, he is showing absolutely zero interest in actually using the toilet for its intended purpose. He does enjoy flushing it, reading books about it and talking about it, but sitting on it causes fear and outright anger. I’ve half-tried a few times to move him toward using the toilet (he has cute underwear, and he laughed when I had his stuffed monkey “pee” on the toilet), but nothing seems to get his interest. Instead, he answers me with a firm, “no!” each time I ask him if he’d like to try sitting on the toilet.
I wonder sometimes if I should stop encouraging it and enticing him, and just decide to do it. I do have friends with boys this age who are trained, or who are mostly trained as well, which makes me feel even worse. Should I be pushing this harder? Should I be just putting him on the toilet, even if he is crying and protesting?
My instinct says no. Just like I allowed him to stop nursing when he was ready and never forced him to eat foods he wasn’t interested in (and now, he eats about 80% of what he’s served!), I can’t rationalize forcing him to sit on the toilet either. Whereas many of my friends’ kids show genuine excitement and interest in sitting on the toilet, my son absolutely does not. But I know he will. The rational side of me knows that when the time is right, two months from now or six, he will use the toilet.
But I still can’t shake this feeling that maybe I could, or should, be doing more. I read a blog today that said the common belief (and one that has been validated by my friends with boys) that boys toilet train later is untrue and lazy, so there goes another one of my excuses for waiting.
Somedays, I think we’re going to wait. And then, I think we should start. What I really need to do is stop pressuring myself (all of this pressure is coming from me!) and just watch his signals, like I’ve done with everything else in the last two years. It’s worked well with every other milestone. It’s just hard to be confident sometimes when I feel like everyone around me is moving forward to the next stage, but we’re just not there yet.
Do you/did you put pressure on yourself to toilet train your child? What did you ultimately decide?